How to Kick Off Performance Reviews with Impactful "Killing Words" for a Positive Start
Description: Learn how to start performance reviews with personalized, impactful words—what I call "killing words"—that make your team members feel valued, appreciated, and comfortable from the start.
Performance reviews are often seen as formal and sometimes even daunting. However, they don’t have to be that way! By starting your meeting with a personalized touch, using what I like to call "killing words", you can transform the atmosphere into something positive and encouraging.
So, what exactly are "killing words"? This is a term I use to describe words that help open conversations comfortably with your team members, showing genuine interest in who they are. These are not just compliments or icebreakers, but meaningful words that make the other person feel seen, valued, and important. By using "killing words," you set a positive tone right from the beginning, making the formal aspects of the review easier to navigate.
That being said, it’s essential to remember that this is a formal performance review. While the tone can be warm and positive, the main purpose is to evaluate performance, discuss growth opportunities, and set clear expectations moving forward. By starting with these thoughtful words, you make it easier to transition into the formal aspects of the conversation, ensuring both sides feel comfortable and engaged.
Positive feedback builds stronger connections in performance reviews.
Why Use Killing Words in Performance Reviews?
While performance reviews often focus on metrics, goals, and areas for improvement, starting with something more personal helps break the ice and lowers any anxiety your team member might have. Killing words show that you're interested in them as individuals, not just employees. This creates a sense of mutual respect and makes the conversation more open and honest from the start.
Killing words highlight their strengths, personality, and unique contributions. This approach opens the conversation in a more positive light, leading to a more honest and engaging review process.
1. Start by Acknowledging Their Personal Qualities
Before jumping into performance metrics, take a moment to reflect on the personal traits you admire in the individual. These words can make a powerful, immediate impact.
- "You have such a warm and approachable personality—it's something everyone in the team appreciates."
- "I really admire how you always bring such positive energy to the team, no matter how tough things get."
2. Compliment Their Work Ethic and Commitment
Recognizing not just results but the dedication behind them is key. Complimenting someone's work ethic shows that you appreciate the hard work they put in, making your words more impactful.
- "Your determination and resilience are truly impressive. You always put in your best effort, no matter the challenge."
- "Your attention to detail has not gone unnoticed, and it really makes a difference in the quality of your work."
Reflecting on feedback helps team members grow and improve.
3. Recognize Their Unique Contributions
Each team member brings something unique to the table. Highlighting what makes them special leaves a lasting impression and makes them feel irreplaceable.
- "Your creativity and innovative thinking really helped us navigate some tough situations this year."
- "The way you collaborate with others makes you such an important part of our team."
4. Address Their Strengths and Potential
Killing words can also encourage someone to recognize their potential and push further. Highlighting their strengths shows that you see more in them than what’s visible on the surface.
- "You have such a knack for leadership, even in small group settings. I can see you continuing to grow in that area."
- "Your communication skills have really improved, and I believe there’s even more potential for you to shine."
5. Offer Encouragement Through Empathy
Empathy is one of the most powerful tools in performance reviews, especially when things haven’t gone as planned. Empathetic, encouraging killing words can boost morale and show understanding.
- "I know this year has been full of challenges, but your perseverance and positive attitude have been incredible."
- "Even though we had some setbacks, the way you handled them shows your resilience and ability to grow."
Final Thoughts
Starting a performance review with impactful killing words is more than just a gesture—it’s a way to set a positive and motivating tone for the entire conversation. By recognizing each team member's unique qualities, you build stronger connections, foster trust, and encourage continued growth.
Remember, while killing words help set the mood, the performance review remains a formal discussion. It’s a chance to reflect on the past, set future goals, and have an honest conversation about expectations moving forward. When your team members feel valued not just for their work but for who they are, they're more likely to engage in the review process openly and feel motivated to keep improving.
So next time you're preparing for a performance review, think about the killing words you can use to create a positive and impactful conversation.
